Questions to Ask a Builder Before a Custom Home Build: What You Need to Know

Choosing a builder is one of the biggest decisions you’ll make in your custom home journey. The right builder will not only bring your vision to life but will also help you stay on budget and avoid unnecessary stress. On the other hand, the wrong builder could lead to delays, unexpected costs, and a lot of frustration.

Meeting with potential builders is an exciting step, but it can also be overwhelming. When we first started interviewing builders, we were eager to move forward with our home build, but as we gathered more information, we realized we needed to take a step back. Ultimately, we made the difficult decision to delay our build, which allowed us to be more prepared financially and gain a clearer understanding of what we truly wanted. (If you’re curious about why we postponed our build, read our story here).Reviews and referrals are great, but asking the right questions can make all the difference in ensuring your home-building process starts on the right foot.

Here are the key questions we asked (and you should too!) when meeting with builders to make an informed decision.

1. What’s Your Experience with Custom Homes?

Not all builders specialize in custom homes. Some may focus on production homes or remodels, and their processes and expertise may not align with the complexity of a fully custom build. Ask how many custom homes they’ve built and request to see examples of recent projects. This can give you insight into their expertise, style, and attention to detail.

In our experience, one of the most impressive things our builder did early on was recommend that we walk through some of the homes he was currently working on. This gave us an opportunity to see his work firsthand, observe different finishes, and get a real sense of the work they did. It was reassuring to see projects in various stages of completion, and it set a strong foundation of trust from the beginning.

Additionally, consider asking:

• How long have you been building custom homes?
• Do you have a portfolio or model homes I can visit?
• Can you provide references from past custom home clients? Would you be ok if we spoke with them? 
• Have you worked on projects similar in style and scope to mine?
• What do past homeowners say about their experience working with you? 

A builder’s experience will set the tone for the entire process, so you want to feel confident that they have the knowledge and skills to bring your vision to life.

2. How will I stay informed on what’s going on in my build?

This was a big deal for me in my home build. As someone who wanted to document our journey and be very involved in the process, I wanted to know how I would be informed about what was happening and when.

When interviewing builders, you can tell a lot about how they operate just by how they answer this question. Contractors often get a bad rap for not being the greatest communicators, which is understandable—they want to be busy and focused on building, not admin work. I get it. But at the same time, I wanted a builder who prioritized customer experience, and ultimately, that became one of the deciding factors for me.

I asked one builder how I would stay informed, and their response was vague. They made it sound like they would involve me when they ‘needed to’ rather than keeping me consistently in the loop. I even asked if they had a builder schedule—a simple outline of what typically happens and in what order—and when the answer was no, I knew that was something I needed to think about.

In contrast, the builder we ultimately chose had a clear process in place for keeping homeowners informed. They provide a detailed timeline, utilize a project management software that their customers have access to, set expectations upfront, and make communication a priority. I truly believe that will make a difference in our experience. Stay tuned to learn if we were right! 

So when you’re meeting with builders, ask about communication. Some follow-ups to consider:

• Will I have a dedicated project manager?
• How often will I receive updates, and in what format?
• Do you have a project timeline or schedule that homeowners can reference?
• What happens if my point of contact is unavailable?

You want to ensure that the builder has the time, resources, and structure in place to keep your home build moving forward while also keeping you informed along the way.

Some builders take on too many projects at once, which can result in delays and lack of attention to your build. Ask how many homes they build annually and about the size of their team. This will give you an idea of how much focus they can dedicate to your project.

3. What’s Included in the Bid, and What’s Not?

Although we connected with four builders, we ultimately only bid with two, and the difference in what we received was vastly different. This prompted us to ask more questions. We quickly realized that comparing bids wasn’t as simple as looking at the bottom-line price.

To make sense of it all, we actually created our own spreadsheet (which we actually turned into our home build financial tracker once we made decisions!!) to compare bids line by line and understand what seemed to be missing in one versus the other. Surprisingly, even though some line items weren’t explicitly called out in one bid, the overall pricing was still comparable. This made it challenging if we were simply trying to choose based on cost alone.

What stood out the most were items like bath accessories, mirrors, closet shelving, and systems. On one bid, these items were clearly broken down with specific allowances. On another, they were lumped into a single big line item, making it harder to track exactly what we were going to be paying for.

This experience reinforced the importance of understanding exactly what’s included in your builder’s bid. Some key follow-up questions to ask include:

• Are allowances realistic for the finishes I want?
• Are utility connections included in the bid?
• What about permits and inspections?
• How do you handle budgeting for custom features that I might add later?

A clear bid should outline everything: labor, materials, permits, and site preparation. Not all bids are created equal, and some may seem lower upfront because they exclude key expenses. If something isn’t included in the bid, you want to know upfront to avoid costly surprises later. Taking the time to compare bids in detail will help you make an informed decision—not just the cheapest one.

4. How Do You Handle Budgeting and Unexpected Costs?

Even with the most detailed plans, unexpected costs can arise. Most builders will lock in pricing with you when you sign a contract, but that doesn’t mean that items may not end up being more than you initially agreed upon. Material costs change, supply chain issues can drive up costs, etc.

A great builder will be transparent about costs and have a clear process for handling overages. We don’t have any first-hand experience with this yet, but these were additional questions we asked upfront to get a good understanding of what the impacts could be:

• Will you inform me before making changes that impact cost?
• Do you offer cost-saving alternatives if something comes in over budget?
• How do you handle change orders? Are there fees for mid-project adjustments?

Understanding how your builder handles financial surprises will help you stay on track and avoid sticker shock.

5. How Do You Manage Timelines and Delays?

Personally, this was an important question for us, but we don’t have much experience with what this should or could look like. I’ll make updates on this once we get through our build this year. 

However, it seems that every build encounters unforeseen delays—maybe due to weather, supply chain issues, or permitting holdups. The key is how a builder communicates these delays and what they do to mitigate them. We asked other questions like:

• What’s your estimated build timeline?
• How do you handle construction delays?
• Will I receive regular progress updates and how? 
• What’s your plan if material shortages or labor issues arise?

Clear expectations around timelines will help you prepare and avoid frustration if setbacks occur.

6. Can I use my own subcontractors?

This is one of those questions that might not even cross your mind until it does. Maybe you have a family member who installs cabinets, a close friend who owns a flooring company, or you just want to support someone local you know and trust. Whatever the case may be, it’s important to ask your builder upfront if using your own subcontractors is even an option.

Most builders have a trusted crew of subcontractors they’ve worked with for years. These are the people who understand their process, their timelines, and their expectations—and those relationships are a big reason things run smoothly on a job site. When you bring in someone new, even with the best intentions, it can throw off that rhythm.

For us, this question was important from the start. We knew we wanted to use a local excavation company that regularly works with the soil in our area, and we had a close family friend who does electrical that we hoped to involve in the build. We brought both of these up early in the process, and thankfully, our builder was open and understanding. He made it clear that while he typically works with his own subs, he was willing to be flexible—as long as everyone stayed on the same page.

That said, we also understood that involving outside subs could impact cost and timelines. More coordination. More communication. More opportunity for hiccups. And if something went sideways, we knew the responsibility wasn’t just on the builder—it was also on us. At the end of the day, the builder’s name is attached to the project. It’s their reputation, their timeline, and ultimately, their standards being upheld.

So if you’re hoping to bring in someone you know, be sure to talk it through upfront. Understand what your builder is comfortable with, and be willing to take ownership if delays or issues arise. It’s all about mutual trust and clear communication. Some builders are more flexible than others, but you won’t know until you ask.

7. Can we do any of the work ourselves?

If you’re handy or looking for ways to cut costs, this is definitely a question tworth asking early on. Some builders are totally open to homeowners tackling certain parts of the build, while others prefer to keep everything under their crew’s control to maintain consistency and timeline accuracy. Either way, you want to be clear on what’s allowed and where the boundaries are.

For us, we knew from the beginning that we’d love to take on some of the work ourselves. Two things in particular stood out—flooring and the backsplash. Installing flooring is something we’ve done before and felt confident in, and doing it ourselves could save us thousands. The backsplash? That felt like a fun project to tackle after move-in. A little sweat equity, a lot of YouTube tutorials, and a personal touch we could add to our space.

But here’s the thing: if you’re taking on any part of the build yourself, you also have to be prepared to take full ownership of it. That means keeping a close eye on the timeline, making sure your portion doesn’t hold up other trades, and communicating with your builder about when the work will be completed.

One important lesson? If your DIY project causes delays or issues, that’s on you. Your builder is coordinating a lot of moving parts, and the last thing anyone needs is a bottleneck because the flooring didn’t get finished in time for trim installation or other subs couldn’t move forward. So if you’re going to jump in and DIY, make sure you’re truly ready for the responsibility—not just the fun Instagram moment of saying you laid your own floors.

Bonus Tips for Meeting with a Builder

Here are a few extra things to keep in mind:

• Take detailed notes during meetings so you can compare builders later.
• Pay attention to communication style—how they handle your questions now is a good indicator of how they’ll handle issues during the build.
• Don’t be afraid to ask follow-ups—if something feels unclear, get clarification before signing a contract.

Final Thoughts

Hiring a builder is one of the most important decisions in your home-building journey. Taking the time to ask the right questions will help you feel confident in your choice and avoid costly mistakes.

These questions are a great starting point to ensure you hire a builder who’s the perfect fit for your custom home journey. Remember, this is your dream home, so it’s worth taking the time to make the right choice.

Are you currently meeting with builders? What questions are you asking? Let me know in the comments—I’d love to hear your experience!